a technicolor jouney to nowhere

long time no post...

Fri, 15 Jul 2005 21:18:10 GMT

so yeah it's been like a really long time since i updated....guess i just thought that nobody really cared about my life....well right now i'm writing to let ya'll know i'm having a little get together @ my house next week....not sure of the details yet....gotta figure out my work schedule first but i'll keep ya'll updated....if you are interested leave a comment....well that's all for now...later

from the city i will soon be leaving,
Joy

thinking.....

Fri, 27 May 2005 06:23:55 GMT

"How happy is the blameless vestal's lot!
The world forgetting, by the world forgot.
Eternal sunshine of the spotless mind!
Each pray'r accepted, and each wish resign'd."-Alexander Pope

that's a quote i got from the movie eternal sunshine of the spotless mind(awesome movie btw)....i've always really liked it and i put it into my facebook profile a long time ago....anyway it got me thinking, if i could erase faylan from my memory would i?....frankly i'm not really sure....i think if he could erase me he would in a second....he really seems to hate me even though he says he doesn't and he kinda has a right to....in a way it would be alot easier to move on....but, like in the movie, you may erase the memories of that person but you'll never erase the feeling that accompanied them....idk i just think about this kind of stuff alot lately....i've been depressed ever since i came home, this being one of the reasons....not this specific thing but just the whole issue of me and faylan in general....talked to danny about it and that helped alittle better....i told steve how i've been feeling and he said like everyone else"go w/ the flow you worry and think about things too much"....well now i'm rambling....anyway i know that basically there is a very good chance that faylan and i will never be friends again....there is also a chance he will never talk to me again....other people say to just give him time and space to get over it but i really don't think he'll ever forgive me....and that hurts but i guess i'll have to deal w/it cuz it's my fault and even if it wasn't these things just happen, all the time all over the world, and all you can do is just try to accept it and go w/ the flow....again i'm rambling....

well i could write about this all night if i thought anyone was actually going to read my insane rantings....but my wrist really hurts and i need sleep....i invite anyone to post a comment or give me a call if you wanna hang out....i'm still unemployed and have lots of free time....lol omg i sound so desperate....but the truth is even though i hate this place i miss my friends here....so yeah sorry for the long boring meaningless post that is nothing but my bitchings.....i think post like this one are why steve hates all personal blogs and says that they are just ppl whining....he's dumb sometimes....oh well....that's all for me tonight....later all

from the city of really hot weather,

Joy

little update on my life(not like you all care)....

Tue, 10 May 2005 17:57:58 GMT

so right now i'm @ stanford visiting my bestest friend, miss fabianna perez :D....i'm having alot of fun here....her friend sera is awesome....the only really sucky parts are as follows: 1)im a little sick :(, 2)i have to go home soon and i don't have a job and i'm not registered for summer class, 3)finally the thing that is bugging me most is the situation w/ faylan.... now i don't want anyone to take that last one the wrong way.... I actually really do still care about him even if he doesn't believe it....but the fact that we can't get along really gets to me.... and i know it could cause problems for other ppl if we are in the same place @ the same time.... so anyway i called him last night... i don't wanna say we got nowhere cuz i actually feel that he was really honest w/ me about how he felt...and that really hurt me....but it needed to happen...however it's going t be pretty awkward this saturday @ tony's b-day....idk i wrote more but i deleted it cuz it doesn't matter cuz i'm hated in holtville and philly is the only place for me now....it's gonna be a long summer....sorry for everyone i might offend w/ this post...after august 12th you all never have to see me again....peace out

from the city of really smart people (i guess),

Joy

p.s.
sorry for the bitterness

my aim away message tonight...

Fri, 29 Apr 2005 04:57:43 GMT

"So Sad:'(

Just wrote my RA a small novel about how much I'll miss her. Leaving LaSalle for the summer is going to be by far the one of the hardest part of my freshman year. Only two more meetings left w/ Anna. No more dinners left w/ VIP234. So little time to spend w/ all those I love, especially you babe. Is it gonna be like this every year?

Idk but I need rest....last day of Stress Busters tomorrow *hooray*

leave some to make me smile<3"

yeah that pretty much sums it up....peace

from the city i really don't wanna leave,

Joy

"I'm A Fake"- The Used

Mon, 11 Apr 2005 14:18:36 GMT

[Spoken:]
Small, simple, safe price
Rise the wake and carry me with all of my regrets
This is not a small cut that scabs, and dries, and flakes, and heals
And I am not afraid to die
I'm not afraid to bleed, and fuck, and fight.
I want the pain of payment
What's left, but a section of pigmy size cuts
Much like a slew of a thousand unwanted fucks
Would you be my little cut?
Would you be my thousand fucks?
And make mark leaving space for the guilt to be liquid
To fill, and spill over, and under my thoughts
My sad, sorry, selfish cry out to the cutter
I'm cutting trying to picture your black broken heart
Love is not like anything
Especially a fucking knife

Look at me, you can tell
By the way I move and do my hair
Do you think that it's me or it's not me?
I don't even care
I'm alive
I don't smell
I'm the cleanest I have ever been.
I feel big, I feel tall, I feel dry (dry)

[Chorus:]
Just look at me, look at me now
I'm a fake [x4]
Just look at me, look at me now
I'm a fake [x4]

Do I drink? Do I date?
I've got perfect placement all my ink
Satisfied, in your eyes
I'm the biggest fan I've got right now
I made sure, that I look how I wanted to look
The people around me, the people surround me
I feel big, I feel tall, I feel dry (dry)

[Chorus]

My stomach hurts now, and all tied off in lace
I pray, I beg for anything, to hit me in the face
and this sickness isn't me, I pray to fall from grace
The last thing I see is feeling
And I'm telling you I'm a fake [x4]
And I'm telling you I'm...

[Chorus]

i don't want school to end...

Sat, 09 Apr 2005 18:58:25 GMT

wow, never thought i'ld be saying that....so there are 29 more days till i leave philly for the summer....i'm not coming straight home tho....i'm goin' up to the bay area to visit fabi, danny, denisse, and ceasar(my jr. prom date & RYLA buddy)....should be pretty fun....but i'm actually really not looking forward to coming home....i know i've said that before but i really mean it...the thing is when i'm here i'm generally a happy productive person....i've been doing really well in school and i still have time for steve , my friends, and extracurriculars....i mean lately things have been super busy and i looks to stay that way till the end of the semester....but generally it's been a really good semester....however i'm afraid the good times will end as soon as i come home....i do have my friends @ home and i can't counsel for CASC camp unless i come home but other than that there isn't really much there for me anymore....it's not that i don't love my family but it's just i get along w/ them better when i'm thousands of miles away....idk it's really depressing me thinking about going home....and i really want to try to enjoy the time i have left here....well i'm bizzin'

from the city of brotherly love,

Joy

why can't i escape all this zombie stuff

Sat, 09 Apr 2005 15:19:47 GMT

Your Livejournal zombie attack.

LiveJournal Username

The name of your zombie infested home town.

Your zombie killing weapon of choice.

How much do zombies scare you?

Oh noes!!11 A zombie! What do you do?

Blasting zombies left and right with a freaking twelve guage. What do you think?

misslenny13

Curled into a fetal position crying their eyes out.

justins_gospel

Is pwning some zombies with Don't Stop Me Now playing in the background.

legendforged

Is sitting at home watching CNN and eating ice cream.

legendforged

Get ripped to pieces by the zombies. Bummer.

songforaims

Is the zombie king who you must destroy to end the zombie menace.

vamprin

Number of zombies you decapitate.

592

Chances you survive the zombie swarm.

70%

Quiz created by Rob at BlogQuiz.Net

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"Cut Up Angels"-The Used

Mon, 04 Apr 2005 14:35:34 GMT

If we cut out the bad
Well then we'd have nothing left
Like I cut up your mouth
The night I stuffed it all in
And you lied to the Angel
Said I stabbed you to death
If we go at the same time
They'll clean up the mess

I lost my head
You couldn't come
This lust to my brain almost feels like a gun

Watched you bite into the bottle
Watched me kick out the chair
Let you chew up the glass
And laughed as you just hung there
I have thought of rose petals mostly perfect and pure
Then I thought of your petals
And the abuse they've been through

I lost my head
You couldn't come
This lust to my brain almost feels like a gun
You lost your head
I couldn't come
This lust to my brain almost feels like a gun
Whoa whoa

I told the angels
Cant stay in heaven
I asked the devil
If we cut out the bad well then we'd have nothing left
Like I cut up your angels
Yeah you stabbed me to death

I lost my head
You couldn't come
This lust to my brain almost feels like a gun
You lost your head
I couldn't come
This lust to my brain almost feels like a gun

i don't know what is with me and this song this morning....i've seriously listen to it like 5 times in a row....but yeah so i really llike it and i'm not sure why....but anywho....hopefully get time to write more later

"Banana Pancakes"-Jack Jonhson

Fri, 01 Apr 2005 01:43:45 GMT

Cant you see that its just raining
Aint no need to go outside...
But Baby, You hardly even notice
When I try to show you this
Song is meant to keep ya
From doing what your supposed to
Waking up too early
Maybe we can sleep in
Ill make you banana pancakes
Pretend like its the weekend now

And we can pretend it all the time
Cant you see that its just raining
Aint no need to go outside

Just maybe, like and ukelele
Mommy made a baby
Really dont mind the breakfast
Cause your my little lady
Lady lady love me
Cause I love to lay here lazy
We could close the curtains
Pretend like there's no work outside

And we can pretend it all the time
Cant you see that its just raining
Aint no need to go outside
Aint no need aint no need Mmmm MMmmm
Cant you see cant you see
Rain all day
And I dont mind.

The telephone is singing
Ringing its too early
Don't pick it up
We don't need to we got everything
We need right here
And everything we need is enough
Just so easy
When the whole world fits inside of your arms
Don't really need to pay attention to the alarm
Wake up slow, yeah wake up slow
You hardly even notice
When I try to show you this
Song is meant to keep ya
From doing what your supposed to
Waking up too early
Maybe we can sleep in
Ill make you banana pancakes
Pretend like its the weekend now

And we can pretend it all the time
Cant you see that its just raining
Aint no need to go outside
Cant you see cant you see,
You gotta wake up slow

hummm....now who does this remind me of....maybe the person who always tells me i don't really have to got to class....that chris can handle the radio show by himself this morning....lol steve is going to be the death off my gpa....but i love him....*sigh* i'm a dork....ok later

SPRING HAS SPRUNG!!!

Wed, 30 Mar 2005 22:25:29 GMT

that's right....even though the trees aren't green yet it definitely feels like spring here @ lasalle....it's also been a great day cuz the two papers i had due friday got moved to next week....which means i have more time to enjoy the weather....and spend w/ steve....we've been dating for about a month now *giddy smile*....*sigh* ah to be in love in spring is a glorious thing....new love is great isn't it....yeah there are those who would say just give it time it won't stay that way....and i know that....but for the time being i'm enjoying it....as for the old flame he's found a new little someone of his own and we are now getting along just fine which it is very good...life is pretty good right....i really almost don't want school to end i'm so happy here....but i do miss my friends in cali...hope you are all well and happy....well if you'll excuse me i think i'm going to go soak up some of the beautiful weather....peace out

from the city of brotherly love,

Joy

damn...

Wed, 16 Mar 2005 15:21:40 GMT

yeah it's been a hell of a long time since i updated....maybe cuz i'm afraid to write about my life for fear that a certain someone might read it and get hurt....but we talked about that last night so hopefully that is worked out....if you're reading this i was really glad to hear from you and know that thing are on the up and up for you...well i'ld love to tell all ya'll the insane week i'm having but i have to go print papers i the computer lab....my computer is still fucked up and won't recognize the printer or anything in the usb*grr*....i think i'll update again of friday....after i've made it through this insane week(hopefully)....ok hope you all are doin' well and getting more sleep than me...ok i'm bizzin'

From the city of brotherly love,

joy

"Burn"-Usher

Wed, 09 Mar 2005 04:01:09 GMT

Girl, understand why
See it's burning me to hold onto this
I know this is something I gotta do
But that don't mean I want to
What I'm trying to say is that I-love-you I just
I feel like this is coming to an end
And its better for me to let it go now than hold on and hurt you
I gotta let it burn

[Verse 1]
It's gonna burn for me to say this
But it's comin from my heart
It's been a long time coming
But we done been fell apart
Really wanna work this out
But I don't think ya gonna change ya
I do but you don't
Think it's best we go our separate ways
Tell me why I should stay in this relationship
When I'm hurting baby, I ain't happy baby
Plus theres so many other things I gotta deal with
I think that you should let it burn

[Chorus]
When your feeling ain't the same and your body don't want to
But you know gotta let it go cuz the party ain't jumpin' like it used to
Even though this might bruise you
Let it burn
Let it burn
Gotta let it burn

Deep down you know it's best for you except but you
Hate the thought of her being with someone else
But you know that it's over
You know that it was through
Let it burn
Let it burn
Gotta let it burn

[Verse 2]
Sendin' pages I ain't supposed to
Got somebody here but I want you
Cause the feelin ain't the same find myself
Callin' her your name
Ladies tell me do you understand?
Now all my fellas do you feel my pain?
It's the way I feel
I know I made a mistake
Now it's too late
I know she ain't comin back
What I gotta do now
To get my shorty back
Ooo ooo ooo ooooh
Man I don't know what I'm gonna do
Without my booo
You've been gone for too long
It's been fifty-eleven days, um-teen hours
Imma be burnin' till you return (let it burn)

[Chorus]
When your feeling ain't the same and your body don't want to
But you know gotta let it go cuz the party ain't jumpin' like it used to
Even though this might bruise you
Let it burn (let it burn, let it burn, you gon'learn)
Let it burn (gotta let it burn)
Gotta let it burn

Deep down you know it's best for yourself but you
Hate the thought of her being with someone else
But you know that it's over
you know that it was through
Let it burn
Let it burn
Gotta let it burn

[Bridge]
I'm twisted cuz one side of me is tellin' me that I need to move on
On the other side I wanna break down and cry (ooooh)
I'm twisted cuz one side of me is tellin' me that I need to move on
On the other side I wanna break down and cry (yeah)

[Breakdown]
Ooh ooh ooh ooh ooh oooh
Ooh ooh oooh (can ya feel me burnin'?)
Ooh ooh ooh oooh ooh oooh

So many days, so many hours
I'm still burnin' till you return

[Chorus]
When your feeling ain't the same and your body don't want to
But you know gotta let it go cuz the party ain't jumpin' like it used to
Even though this might bruise you
Let it burn
Let it burn
Gotta let it burn

Deep down you know it's best for yourself but you
Hate the thought of her being with someone else
But you know that it's over
You know that it was through
Let it burn
Let it burn
Gotta let it burn

i really need something to help me feel better....alot alcohol might do the tick....anyway this song came on in tony's car on the way back from the fair and i almost started to cry....you're not the only one hurting...i wish you would talk to me....oh well....i'll be gone soon...hope that will help make you happier...i'm sorry

"The Joker"-Steve Miller Band

Mon, 28 Feb 2005 22:48:22 GMT

Some people call me the space cowboy, yeah
Some call me the gangster of love
Some people call me Maurice
Cause I speak of the pompatus of love

People talk about me, baby
Say I'm doin' you wrong, doin' you wrong
Well, don't you worry baby
Don't worry
Cause I'm right here, right here, right here, right here at home

Cause I'm a picker
I'm a grinner
I'm a lover
And I'm a sinner
I play my music in the sun

I'm a joker
I'm a smoker
I'm a midnight toker
I get my lovin' on the run
Wooo Wooooo

You're the cutest thing
That I ever did see
I really love your peaches
Want to shake your tree
Lovey-dovey, lovey-dovey, lovey-dovey all the time
Ooo-eee baby, I'll sure show you a good time

Cause I'm a picker
I'm a grinner
I'm a lover
And I'm a sinner
I play my music in the sun

I'm a joker
I'm a smoker
I'm a midnight toker
I sure don't want to hurt no one

Wooo Woooo

People keep talking about me baby
They say I'm doin' you wrong
Well don't you worry, don't worry, no don't worry mama
Cause I'm right here at home

You're the cutest thing I ever did see
Really love your peaches want to shake your tree
Lovey-dovey, lovey-dovey, lovey-dovey all the time
Come on baby and I'll show you a good time

this song reminds me of someone...maybe cuz we listened to it together...maybe cuz of the name of the band...maybe cuz they made a really cute reference to one of the lyrics...it's hard i don't wanna say too much...i think i've already said enough to hurt someone...you know who you are and i'm sorry...well i think i'll write more about this later...gotta study for a poli sci midterm...peace

college life is bad for you....but so much fun!!!

Fri, 11 Feb 2005 06:29:35 GMT

yeah i feel like i'm neglecting my journal....i mean last semester i check evey day like three times a day to see it there were and new entries on my friends page....now i look and i'm like damn how long has it been since i read anyones journal damn.....oh well....just busy this semester....that's what happens when you actually start to have a social life....so yeah already this semester i skip class too much, don't do my work enough, drink too much, sleep too little(@ night that is), nap every day like it's my job, eat WAY too much junk food, party on week nights, and flirt w/ lots of guys when i'm drunk....which isn't as bad now that faylan and i are on a break....don't worry we're still together, sorta....well the important part is we're defiantly not broke up and we still love e/o and are talking and not fighting....which was kinda why we took the break....anyway....gtg finish writing a paper that was due tuesday....lol i might turn it in tomorrow before i go out....maybe....if i feel like it....lol....i'm so bad....well peace out girl scouts

from the city of brotherly love,

Joy

"Number One" - John Legend ft. Kanye West

Fri, 11 Feb 2005 04:33:19 GMT

Ooh I promise not to do it again
I promise not to do it

You can't say I don't love you
Just because I cheat on you
Cuz you can't see all I do
To keep you from knowing the things I do
Like erase my phone
And keep it out of town
I keep it strapped up when I sleep around
Well I should have known one say you'd find out
But you can't go and leave me now

You know that I love you
There's no one above you
I said it the last time
But this is the last time
Don't make me over
Cuz I can be faithful
Baby you're my number one
You're my number one

Now who is she?
What's her name?
You don't need to know about everything
We fight about this
We fight about that
You hang up the phone and call me right back
Well I'll never be something I'm not
Please don't throw away what we've got
Cuz we've been together for way too long
I was playing around but I'm coming home

You know that I love you (know that I love you)
There's no one above you (no one above you)
I said it the last time (hey, hey)
But this is the last time
Don't make me over (don't leave me baby)
Cuz I can be faithful (you know I try)
Baby you're my number one (baby)
You're my number one

[Kanye's Rap]
I keep you laced up so you aint gotta borrow nothing
From them broke ass friends who be bargain hunting
They say they shop on eBay --baby why is they frontin'?
They be on the internet but they never cop nothin'
I keep you in Girl what is those on your toes?
And your neck staying froze off that rose colored gold
I suppose you was told by them hoes I was cheatin'
Thinkin' my heart don't got nothing to do with my penis
He got a mind of his own and he just be seeing shit
And I don't wanna cheat but I don't be saying shit
I try to jack off he ask me who is you playin' wit?
But I know he love you he told me you was his favorite

You know that I love you (know that I love you)
There's no one above you (above you)
I said it the last time (said it the last time)
But this is the last time (hey hey hey yeah)
Don't make me over (don't leave me baby)
Cuz I can be faithful (you know I try)
Baby you're my number one (oh baby)
You're my number one

You're making it hard for me
You're messing up everything
You tell me I gotta leave
Say we over
You saw that she came over
Came in the Range Rover
Left with a hangover
Say we over

I promise I won't cheat
I promise I won't lie
I promise I'll act right
Say we over
You can't tell me
I can't have you
I can't have that
We aint over

Hey, it aint over baby
We aint over
Oh you don't need to go it's not over
We aint over
Oh...
We aint over
Oh it's gonna be alright now don't go now

omg i heard the rap part in this and just started to bust up.....i mean wow.....gotta love kanye west and john legend.....good stuff

life is crazy....but that's the way i like it....

Fri, 04 Feb 2005 04:45:21 GMT

damn it's been along time since i update....well let's see....the eagles are going to the super bowl and i'm crazy excited....E-A-G-L-E-S, EAGLES!!!!!....yeah so awesome....school?....eh, school is school....really like my interpersonal communication class tho....i think i'm getting more of an idea of what i wanna do w/ my life after college....then again maybe not....lol idk....friends?....well chris and i are cool....it was weird for a little while and i'm still not sure why....but now things are cool....the show was fun today....like old times....even tho we were both sick*bleh*.....oh btw we've got a new timeslot....9-11 thursday mornings....idk why chris wanted to do the mornings again but w/e....if you wanna listen the link is http://www.lasalle.edu/wexp/index.html ....well what else....sam's b-day was last weekend and it was insane....let's see there was one piercing, one tattoo, two parties, a couple of guys hitting on us that we had to turn down cuz we have boyfriends, and LOTS of alcohol....it was AWESOME....and now i have really cool fairy tattoo(don't worry i was completely sober when i got it)....faylan and i are good....wish he was already graduated and here w/ me but,like anna said,what doesn't kill the relationship will make it stronger....anyway that's my life right now....i miss all ya'll in cali....especially you baby.....well this college girl is bizzin'....peace

from the city of brotherly love (and hopefully the home of the 2005 super bowl champs),

Joy

it's too cold and snowy to do anything else......

Sun, 23 Jan 2005 01:12:30 GMT

You Are From Mercury

You are talkative, clever, and knowledgeable - and it shows.
You probably never leave home without your cell phone!
You're witty, expressive, and aware of everything going on around you.
You love learning, playing, and taking in all of what life has to offer.
Be careful not to talk your friends' ears off, and temper your need to know everything.

What Planet Are You From?

You Are a Visionary Soul

You are a curious person, always in a state of awareness.
Connected to all things spiritual, you are very connect to your soul.
You are wise and bright: able to reason and be reasonable.
Occasionally, you get quite depressed and have dark feelings.

You have great vision and can be very insightful.
In fact, you are often profound in a way that surprises yourself.
Visionary souls like you can be the best type of friend.
You are intuitive, understanding, sympathetic, and a good healer.

Souls you are most compatible with: Old Soul and Peacemaker Soul

What Kind of Soul Are You?

big news....

Wed, 19 Jan 2005 22:54:35 GMT

OMG IT'S SNOWING GUYS....*yay* my first snow in philly i'm so excited....

it was the second day on classes today so now i've been to all of my classes and i've come to one conclusion: i'm not going to have much fun this semester....it's not that i have bad teachers or boring classes....actually most of them seem like there going to be pretty cool....it's just gonna be alot of work....oh well....to cold to go out to partying and stuff anyway....other interesting thing about today it that i found out that chris is in my interpersonal communication class....so @ least i have one friend in one of my classes this semester......

well gtg cuz i've got homework to do so i can go watch go the b-ball game against GW(dumb school that rejected me, i hope we beat them, but i doubt we will w/e)....can you believe it only the second day of class and already i have like a ton of reading and two assignments due tomorrow....ah well....i'm outie...peace bitches

from the city of brotherly love(and snow, don't forget the snow lol),

Joy

oh and one more thing....

Fri, 14 Jan 2005 06:12:01 GMT

faylan and i are back together :D.....oh i'm so happy and so is he.....to bad i have to leave so soon :(....love is a beautiful and painful thing but it ok just wanted to let ya'll know.....so now i'm bizzin' to take care of stuff i need to do before i leave and that if i don't do soon my mom will kill me....peace out

from the carrot capital of the world which i will soon again be leaving *tear tear*,

Joy

"Worst December"-Sugarcult

Fri, 14 Jan 2005 05:37:54 GMT

It's a big mistake
50 days, 3 months away
I'd be laughing today
But your voice on the phone gives me no reason
Don't take from me
My heart is barely beating
Don't take from me
I'm falling down

All I want to do is lie in bed with you
All I really ever need is you
All I got to do is give up all I have to be with you

It's a different day
1500 miles away
Why would you want to stay?
So take a look around

All I want to do is lie in bed with you
All I really ever need is you
All I got to do is give up all I have to be with you

All I want to do is to be close to you
All I want to do is to be next to you
All I want is you to give up all we had to be
I can't remember why I'm here
If you'd let me spend my life with you

December's gone
It came and went
All I really need is you
I'm waiting here for you
December's gone
It came and went

btw this whole album is awesome so check it out....ok that's all...later

how do you help a friend when you can't help yourself.....

Thu, 30 Dec 2004 08:37:54 GMT

*sigh*please someone kill me now....danny you promised you would....either that or better yet just blow up the world cuz it's so screwed up....sorry for the pessimism but i can't really help it....seeing my friends in pain and not being able to fix it really gets me down....plus i'm still just not very happy in my own life right now....and i can't even talk to the only person who might be able to make it better cuz i just can't find the words to say how i feel....besides even if i could he probably would care anyway cuz he's moved on and i'm left here alone....w/e....must sleep....hopefully the tomorrow will be better....night all

from the city of dumb ppl who gossip too much and ruin other ppl's lives,

Joy

one very grateful little girl....

Tue, 28 Dec 2004 01:06:07 GMT

yup that's me....wow i love christmas....not because of the food or the gifts or the songs or the traditions.....don't get me wrong i do love all that stuff....but because it always reminds me of how blessed i am....like there have been alot of things in my life that have really not been good....but through it all i have had a roof over my head and food to eat(even if it came from the cafeteria *bleh*)....not that i'm happy w/ my life cuz i'm not....but i'm happy w/ the material things in my life....i had nothing i really wanted for x-mas (except the third invader zim dvd) and i look @ other ppls list of what they got and realize that i didn't get as much.....but on x-mas morning after we were all done opening gifts i sat back and was like wow this is more that i asked for or wanted....it made me really thankful.....and it let's me know that @ least one part of my life is ok....yeah i'm making no sense again....anyway....i'm also grateful that 2004 is almost over....as i’ve told several ppl 2004 was both the best and worst year of my life....but in only 4 more days it’s all over...and i know 2005 won’t be all i want it to be....but it’s the possibility that it could be that is so great...well now that i’ve made myself look like a total dork...it’s ok cuz you all already knew that about me anyway...h-town bizzin’ out

not from the city of brotherly love cuz i'm finally home,

Joy

3.46 bitcheeeeeeeeeeessssss.....

Thu, 23 Dec 2004 00:15:40 GMT

hell yeah....that would be my gpa for those of you wondering about the title....that's right i got my grades and they're way better than i thought....take a look....

Intro Mass Media B

First Year Odyssey B

Global Hist To 1500 A

Math:Myths & Realities B

The Christian Tradition A

i kinda feel bad cuz i know i didn't earn those grades....i slacked majorly the second half of the semester.... i kinda think my professors gave them to me out of sympathy....cuz of my ADHD and they all knew i was worried about keeping my scholarship....chris says i should just take the hand out and move on....i think maybe i'll listen to him for once....see chris i do take your advice sometimes....when it's good...jk it's always good....i'm usually just too stubborn to take it....anyway....

i also just talked to kristin....i was very happy to see my little jellyfish....we chatted for awhile on allyson front porch....good times....hopefully i'll see her again before i go back east....but everyone is so demanding of my time....i've been here since saturday and the only person i'ld really seen was becky and now today all of a sudden everyone wants to hang out....lol like they say when it rains it pours....pobably has something to do w/ the fact that no one knew i was home till today....w/e.... anyway i'm bizzin' to go help becky wrap stuff....peace out ya'll

not from the city of brotherly love cuz i'm finally home,

Joy

"Welcome To My Life"-Simple Plan

Wed, 22 Dec 2004 09:01:17 GMT

Do you ever feel like breaking down?
Do you ever feel out of place?
Like somehow you just don't belong
And no one understands you
Do you ever wanna runaway?
Do you lock yourself in your room?
With the radio on turned up so loud
That no one hears you screaming

No you don't know what it's like
When nothing feels all right
You don't know what it's like
To be like me

To be hurt
To feel lost
To be left out in the dark
To be kicked when you're down
To feel like you've been pushed around
To be on the edge of breaking down
And no one's there to save you
No you don't know what it's like
Welcome to my life

Do you wanna be somebody else?
Are you sick of feeling so left out?
Are you desperate to find something more?
Before your life is over
Are you stuck inside a world you hate?
Are you sick of everyone around?
With their big fake smiles and stupid lies
While deep inside you're bleeding

No you don't know what it's like
When nothing feels all right
You don't know what it's like
To be like me

To be hurt
To feel lost
To be left out in the dark
To be kicked when you're down
To feel like you've been pushed around
To be on the edge of breaking down
And no one's there to save you
No you don't know what it's like
Welcome to my life

No one ever lied straight to your face
No one ever stabbed you in the back
You might think I'm happy but I'm not gonna be okay
Everybody always gave you what you wanted
Never had to work it was always there
You don't know what it's like, what it's like

To be hurt
To feel lost
To be left out in the dark
To be kicked when you're down
To feel like you've been pushed around
To be on the edge of breaking down
And no one's there to save you
No you don't know what it's like (what it's like)

To be hurt
To feel lost
To be left out in the dark
To be kicked when you're down
To feel like you've been pushed around
To be on the edge of breaking down
And no one's there to save you
No you don't know what it's like
Welcome to my life
Welcome to my life
Welcome to my life

i'm not really a simple plan fan....and i know you're all thinking "god i wish she would stop w/ all the poor-me-my-life-sux-so-much routine" and you're probably right....oh well no one cares....just posting to kill time before daria is on....later

"Lately"-Divine

Tue, 14 Dec 2004 07:18:48 GMT

Lately (i've been watching you)
Been thinkin 'bout u baby
(and everything u do)
just sittin away watching the days go by (2x)
have u ever felt a breeze hit hard,
like the wind was blowing it apart
as you're spinning like a merry-go-round,
indications of a storm touching down
wish that i can wear the rain and storm,
but i guess it was heart break from the norm
was a day i will always remember,
the saddest day in sweet november...
Lately (i've been watching you) been thinkin 'bout u baby
(and everything u do)
just sittin away watching the days go by (2x)
baby i'm on my knees praying God help me please,
bring my baby back, right back to me
if lovin you was right then i don't wanna go wrong
so i drown myself with tears,
sittin' here, singin' another sad love song
Lately (i've been watching you) been thinkin 'bout u baby
(and everything u do)
just sittin away watching the days go by (2x)
Lately i've been torn apart,
i wish you hadn't broke my heart
i'm missin' you babe,
missin' you every day
Lately i've been torn apart,
i wish you hadn't broke my heart
i'm missin' you babe,
missin' every day
Lately (i've been watching you) been thinkin 'bout u baby
(and everything u do)
just sittin away watching the days go by (2x)